Do you have an unbearable parable that you would love to transmit? Is your whisper eclipsed? Do you desire an ergonomically designed lo-fi microphone that will enable your voice to rise above the din of steam engines and intermittent tectonic shifts?

Presenting the Crank & Barrel, a cool little nugget that fits in your paws and lets you holler like none other. Using the same ingredients as my Town & Mouth Report microphone, the C & B is constructed in a sturdy, wood shell and features approximately 4' of wriggly tail, terminated to an eighth inch input. Plug it into your favorite FX rig, use it as a harmonica mic, or practice your favorite yodeling jams.